Thoughts

I'm well into the semester now...school is hard. I constantly have to tell myself to keep going, that it will all be over in a year or so. Sometimes I wonder if it is even worth it, though...I mean, what can a person with a Master's degree in History do? Not much. I can't teach school (no education degree or certificate), I can't teach in the university (no PhD), I can't get a job as a reference librarian (no degree), I probably couldn't even get a job in one of our local museums (no art history degree - and no experience). Why am I doing this to myself!!!???

And then I start questioning everything that I am doing right now. I mean, I live in a cool city with lots of stuff to do, go to a big church with lots of nice, friendly, Christian people, and live in a nice 2-bedroom apartment in a nice part of town...and yet, all I can think about is going back to Abilene. I miss it so much, and I miss my family most of all. I know, Derek is my true family now, but I just wish I was closer to Mom and Dad, and also to where my brother was going to school (ACU), so I could hang out with all of them more. I mean, they're pretty cool people.

I'm excited about going to Abilene for Homecoming next weekend (Oct. 14) and then the week after that Mark is coming to San Antonio to visit. However, at the end of those long weekends spent with family, as Sunday afternoon rolls around and the inevitable trip home looms before me, it takes all my strength to drag myself away from my mom's hug and trudge to the car...Abilene is so nice, so simple, so...home. What can I do?